Check this out!

Check out this blog http://aplacecalledsimplicity.blogspot.com/. These people have been through a lot this month and are still able to see the good. It broke my heart to read their story.

I am going to be brutally honest...

about myself. I am a total control freak in every sense of the word. Everything has a place and needs to be in the place. I wear the pants in this house most of the time. Well, I like to think so. Sorry honey! We tend to butt heads sometimes b/c we are both this way. I daydream all the time about things and events and how they will turn out. When they don't then I over analyze about what I did wrong that they didn't go my way. I know 95% of us in the adoption world pictured that day when your child will forever be in your arms. It will be glorious and happy. God will open the sky just for you and you will see this big beautiful ray of light. And like me it didn't quite turn out how you expected. But you lived through it and finally realized after days of over analyzing that it turned out how God knew it would. You actually have no control over the big things like that.

I finally realized I have become that person. That one who lets someone else take over the wheel and I just live my life. We went to an seminar last week and met another family who adopted internationally. We both spoke of our experiences, me actually exposing myself when asked what was your experience like. Well, lets see I knew Cameron would have an adjustment but I never thought about my adjustment. The fact that even though I hadn't given birth but my mommy hormones kicked in anyway. And boy did they kick in.

One woman asked the other adoptive family when and how God spoke to them about pursuing international adoption. First of all I found it I little wrong to ask this. I think it is a personal thing and if someone wants to let you know then they should on their terms. I also realized that God usually doesn't put a sign and say here this is your next step in life. And he certainly doesn't show you once since it takes most of us a few times before we "get" it. If he did everyone would have the perfect life and how boring would that be. She then proceeded to ask me did you ever worry about him being taken away. I answered right away "No." I worried more about him being safe but I knew that this was my path and God was in control. After thinking about it later that night I realized that the #1 thing I learned from international adoption (besides how much I can love one person) is to finally let go and let someone else take the wheel.

I have slowly been letting that happen and I truly feel better about life. My life. It still comes out at times especially when it comes to my home but there is a reason and a really long story for another time. Today I finally decided to let God take the wheel. Something very big & personal is going on in my life and I will fill you in at a later date (Jessica) but until then know that I have thought long & hard the last few months but once again it isn't turning out how I dreamed it would but it will turn out how it is meant to be!

Can you say slacker?!

Like a lot of other people I have been slacking on the blogging. This cold weather makes me just want to stay in bed under the covers. There is a lot going on the Farrell household and a lot left to do. Cameron will be two next month & this mom is just not ready. I can't believe that my baby is growing up so fast. We are actually doing his birthday party at a bounce house that he loves going to. We went there for our friends' children's party last month and he was wild man there. After his birthday he will be moved to his big boy room. He has picked Disney's Cars for the theme and now mom gets to paint his room red. I love painting so it will be fun to do for him. Then his current room will become the playroom. I can't wait to have my living room back. There are toys growing out of the walls since Christmas was here. Although he is so good about picking them I am ready to see them have a place of their own. If anyone out there knows a good painter let me know. We are wanting to paint our great room and I would love to do it but I am afraid of heights and really don't want to paint the 19 foot walls. And no offense to my husband but I am usually the one painting around here. Also any storage ideas would be good too. We use the other 2 bedroom closets for our clothing storage and they have to go somewhere else. I thought about getting racks for the basment but don't know how good the covered ones protect against the dust and bugs. (It is unfinished.) This Saturday is getting his 2 year pictures done and I can't wait. He did pretty good last time but was very clingy to us so we had some crying. Now he loves having his picture taken. We are sending some pictures from the last year to his birth mom & foster mom in Guatemala so if you have any advice of the best way to ensure they get there let me know please!!

Last week we had our 1 year anniversary of getting out of PGN, birthmom signoff and BC. Dan had his 3 year anniversary with his company. A lot of people are wanting to jump on the low interest rates so his business is booming more than they ever thought possible. If anyone out there wants to refinance let me know I can hook you up with my hubby. Hehe!

We also have a very big change coming to our family and will let you all in as soon as I know. Needless to say once again my life didn't quite go the way I pictured but it still has turned out pretty good. God has really blessed me with great family & friends. And now thanks to Jessica I am addicted to Facebook and have met even more great friends.

Please keep this beautiful baby girl in your prayers!

Little Abby has an aggressive form of Leukemia and starts her hardest round of chemo tomorrow. This just breaks my heart that this innocent little child has to endure all that she has been through. She has such a long road ahead of her. I pray & think about her every day and the strength she has to survive this.

http://www.riggsfamilyblog.com/2009/01/valley-begins-tomorrow-would-you-pray.html

Nana bought Cameron a pony!

The bounce & spin pony that is. She looked everywhere for this and finally found it at the last minute. I only had to show him how to use it once and he gets on it every day now. He loves just riding it but always ask for you to hook it up. He loves the alphabet and the counting.

Nana these videos are for you. The first one is from the morning after Christmas and the 2nd one is from a few days later.

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

My trips this year!

Because you all asked I will gladly explain. Re-Union '09 is in Oklahoma. Kerri set this up and it will be in Tulsa, Oklahoma June 26-28. MoGuate will be August 6-9 at http://www.tan-tar-a.com/. This is a cool family resort. There are links on the side of my page with all the other blogs.

If anyone knows when Guatoberfest will be let me know.

Hugs,

Mindy

My 2009 Goals

Yes, we are still alive! I have been a little behind on blogging b/c I found a new addiction-The Twilight series. I promised myself I wouldn't start them but after the 1st one I couldn't stop. I am on the last one so I will be back to blogging full time again.

I usually don't do this but this year I decided to make some goals for myself this year. My first one is to meet as many of my blogging buddies in person. I have met so many people through the wonderful world of adoption and blogger. I am so excited to be going to Oklahoma for Reunion '09 in June. Candy I can't wait have adjoining rooms and having our own little party. Then it is off to Missouri for Moguate in August. Again I signed up for this b/c of Candy. I am so excited that Vanessa is now going. I really don't like being in car for hours but it will be worth it to meet all these wonderful people and their beautiful children. Then off to Guatoberfest wherever it may be.

I also want to travel to Chicago this spring/summer. We have been in awhile and love going there. I really hope to be seeing Andrew & his mommy, Ruthanne. I actually had a dream the other night that my dad with went us. He met Ruthanne, they fell in love and she became my step-mom. How funny would that be!!!

Aimee-we have to get together again. I can't believe it has been almost a year since we brought our babies home. We won't be going to the X-mas party this Sunday. We will have to meet up somewhere halfway. How far are you from Columbus?

Anyone out there who wants to stop by or is traveling throught the Cincinnati area our open is always open. Any chance to meet any of my blogger friends!!

This is a shout-out to Jessica at http://www.jadenrussell.com/. You asked how close I was to Western KY, is there where you are from? I think it is time that Hannah, you & I get together. Hannah, I am ready to travel to Louisville but the only place I have been to there is the Louisville Slugger Factory so you will have to tell me a fun place to meet up.

My second goal is to begin our adoption for our 2nd child. We have decided on China but we have to wait until August when we will be married 5 years. We are hoping that Guatemala will re-open by then but you never know. Yes, I really, really want a little girl.

Mommy, finally gave in and let Cameron have his first big taste of barbeque sauce and now we have to have it will every meal.